Tuesday, August 23, 2005

What Would Jesus Do? Probably Not This...

Apparently Pat Robertson has forgotten that old rule: "Thou Shalt Not Kill".

In a surprisingly un-Christ-like move, Pat has decided that we now need to assassinate Venezuelan President Hugo Chavez. According to the AP:

"We have the ability to take him out, and I think the time has come that we exercise that ability," Robertson said recently on his T.V show. "We don't need another $200 billion war to get rid of one, you know, strong-arm dictator," he continued. "It's a whole lot easier to have some of the covert operatives do the job and then get it over with."

Now Pat gets real fanatical:

"You know, I don't know about this doctrine of assassination, but if he thinks we're trying to assassinate him, I think that we really ought to go ahead and do it," Robertson said. "It's a whole lot cheaper than starting a war ... and I don't think any oil shipments will stop."

He thinks we're trying to assassinate him. So we should. Very Christian of you Pat.

*UPDATE 8/24/05

Apparently now this is just a big misunderstanding. According to Pat on the 700 Club:

"I said our special forces could take him out. Take him out could be a number of things including kidnapping," Robertson said on his "The 700 Club" television program. "There are a number of ways of taking out a dictator from power besides killing him. I was misinterpreted."

So when you said "if he thinks we're trying to assassinate him, I think that we really ought to go ahead and do it", you must've forgotten what 'assassinate' means. Let me remind you:

IT MEANS YOU'RE GOING TO FUCKING MURDER SOMEONE!

Any more questions regarding the English language?

*UPDATE 2 - 8/24/05

DIDN'T YOU JUST SAY YOU DIDN'T SUGGEST WE ASSASSINATE CHAVEZ?? Pat, caught in lie #2 is now trying to weasel his way out of trouble. He says:

"Is it right to call for assassination? No, and I apologize for that statement. I spoke in frustration that we should accommodate the man who thinks the U.S. is out to kill him."

I guess that makes it all OK now, right? He was speaking in frustration.

I think he was speaking out of his ass. Anyone else?

2 comments:

MichaelBains said...

Since his mouth constantly spews more cerebral excrement than any anus possibly could, I'd say you're spot on dude.

Spot on...

Anonymous said...

Actually..... Killing Hugo would be a good thing.