Thursday, May 31, 2007

Funny Searches: May 2007

sylvia browne colonized by aliens: I suppose that would explain her girth.

frequency to shut dog up: If you blow a whistle and those inferior human ears don't pick anything up, DON'T blow harder in your efforts to hear something.

evidence of why they thought the earth was flat: "It certainly looks flat, so let's not bother with any rigor in verifying that conclusion." - Anonymous Woo-Woo

20. some people claim that the human body is perfectly designed; what are 5 features that tend to contradict this claim?: Okay, right off the top of my head: 1. Eye's built backwards, so humans, and I believe most vertebrates, have blood vessels in the way of our rods and cones, as well as a blindspot where all the vessels meet. Squids and such don't have that problem 2. Humans are bipeds with spines more or less optimized for quadrupeds. 3. Brain located in an area that requires vulnerable logistics, like the jugular vein. 4. Energy wasted growing and maintaining nipples on males. 5. Critical thinking is not included in the starter package. 6. Bonus: Midochlorians not included in real life.

sylvia browne is demonic: She's evil, but I wouldn't go that far.

rod tod bible trivia: "Which version shall it be?" - Ned Flanders

"sylvia browne" naked: Aaaaahhhhh! Get out of mah brane!

sylvia browne alien in politics: Well, if the aliens are about as intelligent as crossbreeds between Sylvia Browne and Jar-Jar Binks, that would explain quite a lot. If you'll pardon me, I've got yet another nasty image to get out of my head.

I saw my brother during an astral catalepsy (caps removed): It's called sleep paralysis. Was Jar-Jar Binks involved, by the way?

calcium deposit bronze propeller: Now, that's an interesting entry, and I'm not creative enough to make it sexy.

telekinesis truth: It's bunk, but it's still really, really cool.

The Divine Command Theory is not a problem for Christians since man is in a fallen state and cant know good: Except for the problem that 'good' is arbitrary and meaningless under such a system... Plus there's the whole silence from the deity thing.

april 27 mistake funny: I haven't heard that one, yet.

bronze turtle: Right alloy, wrong animal.

adam and eve in layman's terms: A Magic Man done it.

jesus fish lucky charms: Well, it'd fit in with all the other arcane foci included in there.

roadblocks to effective problem in lord of the dogtown: That'd be me, alright. I'm just full of solutions, or at least know people with solutions that it's hard for Lord Li'l Brudder to come up with effective problems.

1 billion, gagillion, fafillion, shabolubalu million illion yillion...yen: Colloquially known as "a lot".

bronze and brains: Got 'em both.

chlorinated water with bronze: I wish I had a swimming pool.

autism and wii: And the crazy 'blame very good things' hypothesis changes to keep up with the times.

Bronze Law: My word is.

3 comments:

Don said...

1 billion, gagillion, fafillion, shabolubalu million illion yillion...yen: Colloquially known as "a lot".

Actually, I believe that much yen converts to about $76.23, but I could be wrong. The value of the dollar has been dropping lately.

Anonymous said...

"I saw my brother during an astral catalepsy"

Perhaps that's "saw" as in "chainsaw" -- could be an interesting (if slightly messy) demonstration of paranormal powers...


"The Divine Command Theory is not a problem for Christians since man is in a fallen state and cant know good"

Ah, the old "I've fallen and I can't get up" argument!


"adam and eve in layman's terms"

Ah, OK, in layman's terms: It is a fable. Get over it.

Berlzebub said...

sylvia browne colonized by aliens
You'd think that any civilization capable of space travel would find a better place to establish a satellite civilization.

"sylvia browne" naked
I'll take aneurysms for $1,000, Alex.

sylvia browne alien in politics
She'd keep predicting she was going to win, loose, say that what she predicted was the majority vote (not the electoral), and still be wrong.

Also, I'm going to take a page from DI, AiG, etc.

In order:
sylvia browne colonized... naked... alien in politics