Friday, July 27, 2007

Pointless Question #3

You're wandering through the Cave of Fiery Doom, a dreaded place no mortal has ever returned from, in search of a vital item that'll let you defeat the evil overlord. Fire elementals, flaming jinn, and red dragons wander about randomly attacking people who wander in.

So why are there treasure chests just lying about? On top of that, why are they filled with ice swords, ice armor, and magic ice-spewing items?

7 comments:

Joshua said...

The jinn are total packrats, not to mention a little OCD. The armour and equipment were left by previous explorers who were foolish enough to assume without evidence that the magical world runs on Taoist-style five-element Cycles of Balance. Idiots.

If they'd bothered to check, they'd know that due to the influence of the Ancient Evil that Must not be Named the magical system switched over to the Cycles of Imbalance at the end of the previous age, such that Fire "insults" Water/ice.

This is why science and skepticism matter even in a magical world. If they bothered to run some tests, they'd know these things before entering the dungeon from which noone has ever escaped.

Anonymous said...

Because fire elementals, flaming jinn & red dragons like to keep their drinks cold. That's why the items are in chests, instead of lying around all over the place.

TabAtkins said...

Treasure chests are just a convenient way to express "there's a piece of treasure!" with a single recognizable graphic.

There are ice items around because that's what the previous adventurers brought in.

Bronze Dog said...

YOU'RE BREAKING THE FOURTH WALL!

YOU'RE BREAKING THE FOURTH WALL!

Infophile said...

Long ago, at the end of the age of pirates, the pirates were all rounded up by the authorities. As penance for their crimes, they were ordered to distribute all the loot they had received around the world to assist random adventurers. They were also ordered to do this in such a way that the loot would be most useful in the areas it's found.

Anonymous said...

Because the gods like you, for some reason.

Also, have you ever noticed that the longer you've been on your 'Quest To Save The World', the better the items available at shops are? Even if its some rinky dink ninja village hidden in an evil forest, they have better swords and greaves and helmets and 'element cards' than the largest city in the world. And why? Because whoever authored your reality wants you to be able to save the world without too much fuss.

Mechalith said...

Spontaneous generation of magical treasures has long been a recognized but poorly understood part of the natural world.

It is thought, and this situation seems to bear the theory out, that high concentrations of magical energy of a particular type will provoke a self-balancing reaction and create a treasureor other item heavily aspected to an opposing force in an attempt to return the metapsychic balance to a neutral state.

In the instance of a cave or dungeon heavily filled with firey creatures, cold or ice based items would be expected.

Certain religious fundamentalists have claimed this phenomenon is evidence for their god, the great Creator. According to their absurd worldview the Creator provides all a sufficiently skilled or clever individual will ever need and hides it in easily accessible spots for their intended user. They claim that failiure to succeed in any of life's trials is the fault of the person failing to live up to the Creator's Plan for them. Similarly, the purpose of these trials (indeed the reason for Evil to exist at all) is as a goad to spur the Creator's chosen to better themselves and overcome the obstacles before them.

But that would be silly.